Buckle Up and Get That Dangerous Goods License in Vic!

Alright mates, let me tell you a little story first before we get into the nitty gritty details…

So a couple years back, I get a call from my buddy Baz. “G’day mate, I need some help shifting some dodgy crap up to Sydney this weekend. You got your dangerous goods ticket?” 

Crickets from me. “Uhhh no Baz…you know I don’t mess with that stuff.”

“Aww come on! It’s just some fireworks and aerosol cans. Harmless fun!”

Yeeeah…harmless for a dangerous goods expert maybe. For an unlicensed muppet like me? No thanks! I quickly changed the subject.

Anyway, that little exchange should give you a taste of why getting properly certified for handling dodgy stuff is so crucial. Don’t be a Muppet! Ready to obtain your dangerous goods licence in Victoria, Australia? Let’s look at what it takes.

How to Apply for That Golden Ticket

Alright first up, what exactly is considered “dangerous goods” that needs a license? We’re talking things like:

– Explosives (fireworks, flares)  

– Flammable liquids/gases (petrol, propane)

– Oxidizing agents (chlorine, peroxides)

– Toxic or corrosive substances (acids, cyanides)

– Radioactive materials

Basically anything that could go kablooey, catch fire, melt your face off, or give you superpowers (and probably cancer) needs special handling. Even common household stuff like aerosols and cleaning solvents count.

So if you want to be legit moving this kind of dodgy cargo around Victoria, you gotta apply for certification first through WorkSafe. The process ain’t too complicated, but there are a bunch of classes and exams to get through depending on what you’re licensing for.

Types of Licenses

– Truck driver? DGVC license 

– Forklift or machinery operator at a factory/depot? Try the DGSO ticket

– Storeperson loading/unloading trucks? DGSL is for you

– And so on…check the specifics for your job

Basically, WorkSafe wants to make sure you know the risks, handling requirements, emergency procedures etc for whatever hazardous crap you’ll be dealing with. Seems reasonable I s’pose? Don’t wanna have numptys blowin’ stuff up!

Coursework incoming!

Okay, once you know which ticket(s) you need, it’s time to go back to school! (Aww jeez…) 

You’ll need to find an accredited training provider that offers prep courses to get you ready for WorkSafe’s theory and practical examinations. Make sure they’re legit – RTO certification and all that.  Expect to spend a couple hundred bucks and 2-3 days in the classroom per license.

It ain’t rocket science, but there’s a decent chunk of material to cover. Stuff like:

– Proper labeling, placarding and documentation  

– Secure stacking, restraining and segregation 

– Emergency procedures and use of protective gear

– Dangerous Goods List and coding/classification system  

And of course the big focus is on safety safety safety! Studying all the potential hazards and how to mitigate them.

Let’s be honest – the coursework can get a bit dry at times. But look at it this way – after sitting through that, the exams are easy peasy! Kinda have to be to let some of us muppets pass…

The Big Test Day

So you’ve sat through the prep course, hopefully took some good notes, because now it’s time for the final exams!

WorkSafe handles administering these at various locations across Victoria. You’ll likely have 2-3 hours for the written theory exam testing all that knowledge you crammed in. Then a practical test where you show you can do things like properly secure loads, use safety equipment, interpret shipping docs etc. 

Piece of piss, right?? Hah…well maybe not. From what I hear, the failure rates can be pretty high, especially for overconfident blokes who didn’t study hard enough. This is serious stuff!

So take it seriously, put in the effort, and I reckon you’ve got a pretty good chance of acing those tests. Then voila – certified dangerous goods handler!

Wrapping It Up

So there you have it mates! The ins and outs of getting legit to handle all that dangerous crap without proper papers.

I could’ve saved myself some hassle (and kept myself out of prison probably) if I’d had my tickets in order when Baz called a couple years back. Live and learn I s’pose?

Anyway, I’ll leave you with one piece of advice – firies and paramedics are waaay cooler than lawyers when it comes to dangerous stuff. Get certified so you don’t risk becoming familiar with the latter!

…Or just find a safer job, ya muppets! Your call. Good luck out there!